If Its a Life Change, There is No Cheating - Only Treats

So - last week was a set back but I recovered quickly. My last post said I weighed in after my PMS showing a .6 lb gain (152). I guess I don't know how to do basic math...When I realized it was a 2 lb increase, I was shocked but mostly perplexed. I couldn't believe it. So, I went for a run, drank some water, got back on track with my eating and weighed again the next day. I was back down to 150.8 lbs and I was relieved.

So what was this 1.2 lbs that was hanging around? And why? Was this left over from my PMS? hormonal? or was it simply just water weight? All I know is that I am glad that my little "Treats" I had didn't really pack on 2 lbs as the scale said that morning!

I thought about the title to this blog when I was contemplating what to write tonight. I reviewed the last two weeks in my mind and decided that - once again - I took a step back. But, I don't see it as "Cheating" or "Failing" or "falling off the wagon".

So -I had to ask myself, "Self, are you sure you are not in denial? Are you sure you are just being to lenient on yourself? Are you making excuses?"

Honestly, I am not 100% sure.

However, For the first time I don't see what I am doing as something that is holding me down, keeping me in line or preventing me from acting a certain way - I see it as something that I am becoming. My fitness is a choice. I choose to eat better and exercise more. I see what I am doing as something I am gaining every time I choose a piece of fruit instead of a cookie. I feel like I am gaining something every time I go to the gym - even if it takes every ounce of energy I have to make myself go.

My fitness and health is not something I have been scared or guilted in to doing.

My fitness and health is something that is not temporary or has an end (unlike what the word "Diet" seems to mean to me).

So - there is no end to my fitness. I can ALWAYS get back on track. I can ALWAYS do better. I can always take it easy. I can always do less.

My biggest struggle and my biggest challenge is to be more consistent with my fitness. And the longer I go with out eating crap and with getting consistent exercise, the worse I feel when I fall short. Still, with my predicted setbacks, I am beginning to feel my fitness evolve and it is very exciting.

Last work out: Saturday

4 miles jogging (new distance record!)
+ core stregthing

Weigh-In Day: Fruit and My Health

Today is the last day of my first week of eating differently to achieve a greater level of fitness for myself. My long term goal is to be able to run more efficiently and increase my speed.

Last Saturday I weighed in at 152.8
Today I weighed in at 151.4
Total loss for this last week = 1.4 lbs

18.6 out of 20 lbs to go...

Workout Today:
Warm up
5 min running using my new Chi Running Form
2 min walking at a fast pace
Repeated 6x
Stretched

Total distance =3.5 miles
Total time = 40 min

My Best Accomplishment This Week: Fruit

http://www.thefruitpages.com/

When I was growing up one of the things that frustrated me most was when I told my mom I was hungry and she would respond, "Eat a piece of fruit." Even better was when she told me, "Drink a glass of water."

This week I traded those frustrating memories into positive lessons. Tuesday I found myself just sitting at my desk staring at my apple - it was 10:30 am - too early for lunch but I was so hungry. The apple had been on my desk since the prior Friday and I was worried it was too ripe and too soft (I cant stand it when they get grainy). My thoughts would shift from the apple to the the chocolate in my drawer. It sounds so dramatic but when I am hungry, all sorts of craziness develops in my mind. I didn't want the apple AT ALL - but I was hungry! Then I realized I was thinking way too much about the damn apple! Just eat it!!! I grabbed the apple off my desk. As soon as I bit into it and tasted how sweet it was, my whole mood changed. It was perfect. I didn't even want the chocolate anymore. I enjoyed every bite.